Military families face unique challenges — and divorce is no exception. While military divorces follow many of the same legal principles as civilian divorces, there are several special considerations for military divorces that can significantly impact the process, including where to file, how benefits are divided, and how deployments affect custody.
Whether you’re an active-duty service member or the spouse of one, understanding these issues can help you move through divorce with clarity and confidence.
Residency Requirements for Military Divorce
Military families move frequently, which can create confusion about where to file for divorce. Maryland allows service members and their spouses to file if:
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The service member is stationed in Maryland,
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The spouse resides in Maryland, or
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Maryland was the couple’s last shared domicile.
This flexibility helps ensure that military families can access the court system even with frequent relocations.
Division of Military Pensions and Benefits
One of the most complex special considerations for military divorces is the division of military retirement benefits. Key points include:
1. The 10/10 Rule
If the marriage lasted 10 years or more and overlapped 10 years of military service, the non-service member spouse may receive direct retirement payments from DFAS.
However, you do NOT need to meet the 10/10 rule for a spouse to be entitled to part of the pension — only for DFAS to pay it directly.
2. Thrift Savings Plan (TSP)
A TSP is treated like a civilian 401(k) and can be divided in the divorce.
3. Survivor Benefit Plan (SBP)
The SBP can protect a former spouse’s share of retirement after the service member’s death. Deciding whether to elect former-spouse coverage is a crucial part of negotiation.
4. Disability Pay
VA disability benefits are not divisible in divorce, but they may affect alimony or other financial considerations.
These issues are highly technical and often require an attorney experienced in military benefit division.
Custody and Parenting Plans for Military Families
Deployment, training schedules, and frequent relocations mean that custody arrangements may need added flexibility.
Key considerations include:
✔ Deployment Clauses
A parenting plan should outline what happens when a parent is deployed, including temporary custody arrangements, communication schedules, and return-to-duty transitions.
✔ Virtual Visitation
Military parents often rely on video calls, messaging, and virtual check-ins to maintain strong parent-child relationships.
✔ Relocation Challenges
PCS (Permanent Change of Station) orders can complicate custody, especially when moving out of state or overseas. Courts must consider what is in the child’s best interest while respecting military demands.
Servicemembers Civil Relief Act (SCRA) Protections
The SCRA offers legal protections to active-duty members involved in civil proceedings, including divorce. Under the SCRA:
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Courts may postpone hearings if military service affects the ability to participate.
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Certain default judgments are prohibited while a parent is deployed or unavailable.
These protections ensure that service members are not disadvantaged during the legal process.
Support, Healthcare & Other Military Benefits
Military divorces can affect eligibility for benefits such as:
✔ TRICARE
Some former spouses may continue TRICARE coverage under the 20/20/20 or 20/20/15 rules.
✔ BAH (Basic Allowance for Housing)
BAH may change during separation and after divorce, depending on dependents and living arrangements.
✔ Commissary and Exchange Benefits
Eligibility depends on length-of-marriage and length-of-service overlaps.
Understanding which benefits end, which can continue, and which require legal action is essential for both spouses.
How Mediation Helps in Military Divorces
Because military divorces often involve long-distance communication, unpredictable schedules, and complex benefits, mediation can be especially helpful. Mediation allows both spouses to:
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Work around deployment and training schedules
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Use virtual meetings for convenience
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Create flexible parenting plans
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Resolve financial issues privately
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Reduce conflict and stress
At Jacobson Family Law, we offer virtual mediation through Zoom, Microsoft Teams, Skype, FaceTime, and telephone, making the process accessible no matter where you are stationed.
Military Divorce Resources on Our Stanstore
To support military families, our Stanstore includes helpful resources such as:
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Divorce and custody checklists
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Military pension division guides
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Co-parenting tools for long-distance parenting
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Podcast episodes on divorce and financial planning
👉 Visit our Stanstore for tools designed to support military families through divorce.
How Jacobson Family Law Supports Military Families
At Jacobson Family Law, we understand the unique challenges service members and military spouses face. We provide:
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Maryland military divorce guidance
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Retirement and SBP planning
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Custody and relocation strategies
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Mediation and conflict resolution
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Virtual and in-person consultations
Our mission is always Keeping the Drama Out of Your Divorce—even when the circumstances are complex.
Need Help Navigating a Military Divorce?
We’re here to support you with the clarity, compassion, and expertise you deserve.
Call 443-741-1147 or schedule a consultation online to get started.
